Your wedding is not a blog post. OK? Got that? I know you already know that, but I think you needed a reminder, because you were seriously having a little meltdown there for a while. Hell, you still are. That’s why you are (er, I am) writing this right now.
You were freaking out that your wedding wasn’t going to be as pretty and as fun as the ones you see on the internet. And not even those impeccably styled ones, where it looks like no one ever sits down at the table or touches the silverware. You’re agonized by the real ones, with real people.
Well, that’s a silly thing if I ever heard one.
See, you think you’ve got this wedding thing sussed. You’ve said all the right things about how you’re planning for the marriage, not just the wedding day. About how you’re focusing on the sentiment and not the material items. About how you want to eff the pretty and the perfect and just be present, prepared, and joyful. You’re making a mental list, you’re checking it forty-five times (a day), you’re crossing off what you can (and not nearly quickly enough, I might add).
But then you saw a wedding recap and yes, it was pretty and fun in ways you were worried yours won’t be (which is still silly and YOU KNOW THIS), but what struck you most while reading it was the realization that there is this one day? Where you ACTUALLY GET MARRIED. It will be a day — not unlike other days — when you wake up, you go about your business, you go to sleep. Sunrise to sunset, and on to the next.
This should not be an earth-shattering revelation, yet somehow it is.
You know, logically, that you will get married. You know what the venue looks like, you know what vendors you’ve hired, you know more or less who is going to be there. You know there will be flowers in vases, you know there will be a ceremony, you know you will party hard afterward. You’ve walked through the entire thing in your head. You have seen it unfold in your mind’s eye. You have plugged in variables X, Y, and Z, and spit out the calculation: Wedding Day.
Your head has known all along that you’re getting married. But now, suddenly, your heart knows it, too.
So right now you’re grappling with both a shock and a stumbling block. And you know that if I had the capacity to solve all of your problems in one fell swoop, I would. As it were, all I can do is offer some suggestions.
- Forget about unattainable levels of coolness. Remember that the blogsphere is but a narrow window into the worlds of others. Refer to this post whenever you need a jolt of truth. Know that for every beautiful wedding blog moment, there is a metaphorical cluttered desk just three feet to the right.* Actually, you should just go ahead and bookmark that page right now.
- And as for the matter of your newly-minted heart: Hold on tight and enjoy the ride.
* (thanks, Kimmie)