When I start to feel overwhelmed by the planning process, I try to think of the beau’s parents.

At the time they decided to get married, the beau’s mom was working in the Bay Area while his dad was stationed upstate as a firefighter with the park service. His dad only got one day off per week — if at all — and that day was Sunday.

One late Saturday night after his shift ended, his dad drove down to the Bay to pick up the beau’s mom. On Sunday, they drove out to Carson City, because there was no waiting period for a marriage license in Nevada like there was in California. His mom wore her nicest dress; his dad donned a tie. They said their vows in a chapel they can’t even remember the name of anymore. Only their parents and a couple of close friends were in attendance. Afterwards, everyone went out for dinner, and then drove back home. Monday came and it was back to work as usual.

I like that little story because the lack of fanfare and spectacle speaks of their deep, quiet commitment. Planning a big wedding wasn’t in the cards for them. They just wanted to be married already. Period. So, they winged it.

Like all of us have before, sometimes I wonder about that a little bit — why go through the stress of planning a full balls-out wedding when the beau and I could just wing it? Why do any of us bother to spend months or years plotting the logistics of moving a horde of people to one place for one day of love and food and drink, when we could just go right out tomorrow, get hitched, and be done with it? The end game is the same, right?

It boils down to choice. And reflecting on the beau’s parents’ marriage choices helps me reaffirm our own.

Their story reminds me that we could have this wedding any other way, and it would still be just as awesome and sweet. But we wanted to throw a giant party for a bunch of our friends and family. We wanted this wedding we’re planning. Remembering that it was a choice makes it less of a burden.

We’re very fortunate to be able to choose to have our wedding this way — some couples experience far less control over their circumstances. And although I’m prone to cynicism, I can also make a choice not to be overpowered by negativity.

Yes, the planning process is going to be stressful at times. But when else in my life am I going to be ordering save-the-date magnets, or figuring out seating arrangements for over 100 people? Never. Praise the giant inflated head of Kanye West, I will never have to do this again. Why not have a little fun with it?

Maybe “fun” and “wedding planning” sound weird together, but you know what? The wedding industry is weird. Getting married is weird. I’m weird.

I’m gonna try to embrace the weirdness with open arms.